All to Pieces
by Sprint to Finish
Summary: A broken angel, a controlling demon. What will happen when one finally presses too far? Can anything remain of an angel who loses his wings? Oneshot


**A/N: **I've always been in love with the picture of Ayase as an angel, and in particular the scene in the opening of the anime where Kanou tears off Ayase's wing never fails to impact me. That scene is where I took my inspiration.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Okane ga Nai_, nor do I make any profit from this piece of fanfiction.

()

Sunshine, pure and gloriously warm, filtered through the glass of a closed kitchen window, bathing the lithe body standing near the pane in comforting light. Eyes closed, a smile on the gentle face, the boy lifted his chin as though he were bathing in the stream of daylight. Clad in soft blue pajamas, he appeared to have just risen from bed but for the mug of steaming tea cupped in his small hands; the quieted kettle steamed from the range at his side. Playful chirping from outside prompted startling blue eyes to open. Instantly they sought out the source: two birds soared high above, their silhouettes barely identifiable as they climbed higher, calling happily to each other. As if in response, the small white wings sprouting from the boys back and poking through holes cut and sewn carefully into his pajama top, rustled softly.

Blue eyes never left the fast-disappearing birds as the smile slid from the boy's face.

His name is Ayase, and he is an angel- the last of his kind in Shinjuku.

However much he might wish to join those birds in the joyous freedom of flight, he knows it will never happen. As pure and innocent as any other of his kind, Ayase nevertheless is an angel whose wings will never fully support him in flight. Though they grow proudly from his back- pure white and with feathers stronger than steel- they are small for his age, and twist awkwardly behind him, unable to press against his back while fully closed. They had been perfect at birth; however, growing up on earth at the side of his angel parents- who were earthbound carrying out a mission against the demons of Shinjuku- had destroyed the little angel's ability to properly develop. The overwhelming pollution of earth's environment and palpable weight of mankind's depravity had sapped his growing strength and stunted the growth of his wings- rendering him a weakened angel with health as feeble as a human's and wings that remained underdeveloped and malformed.

However, the condition of his wings and body were not the only reason the young angel knew the idea was hopeless: he is a prisoner. To be exact, he is the only survivor of the angels who once inhabited this city. A surprise- and rather suspicious- attack by the underworld demons had led to the defeat of the angels, and the subsequent capture of young Ayase. After torment and abuse, he had been showcased and put on auction for a group of demons, only to be bought by a banished demon whom the young angel had met once before: Kanou Somuku.

Now, here he stood four months later, wings and body finally fully healed from the torture that had been inflicted upon him by the unknown demons, and even by Kanou himself. Only a week ago had the young angel finally taken the bandages off his wings: though angel wings are extremely durable and strong, they heal slowly when damaged, and the feathers- which are nearly impossible to pull out- rarely re-grow if plucked. A fully committed angel would have healed within a month, but Ayase's weak body had not been able to adequately handle the stress, and the result had been a slower recuperation.

Realizing where his thoughts had taken him, Ayase shook his head, mentally scolding himself for dwelling on such things when the sky was so beautiful today. He refocused his attention on the blue beyond the glass, only to find that the birds outside had disappeared. A sigh blew gently from his nose.

Four months. The pain was nearly gone, as was the fear he had at first felt towards the demon he now lived with. It had been a long road to where they were now, but Ayase felt that a sense of calm had descended upon them. He had begun to realize that Kanou was just a clueless, ornery demon who hadn't known how to deal with an emotional angel on top of his own banishment; to his credit, he'd learned rather quickly that violence was not the way to develop a healthy relationship. Through trial and error, they had slowly learned how to interact with each other. Ayase liked to believe that the demon was fond of him; and even if he didn't feel love towards the demon, Ayase knew he felt a similar, growing connection. They were two souls, disconnected from their worlds, and simply struggling to understand each other.

While his wings had been bandaged, Ayase had felt vulnerable, often resulting in tense confrontations with the demon. Now that his wings were free of the wrappings, though, it felt as though a new world had been opened up to him- as if he were rediscovering what it meant to be free. He felt bold, more of an equal to the demon. His physical recovery had, in a way, helped him heal mentally as well.

Now, his wings simply felt restless. During the time they had been bandaged, Ayase had not once taken the liberty to stretch his wings. Mostly it had been fear, with the memory of the demons and the torture they had inflicted on his wings constantly present in his mind. A smaller part of him had been scared of Kanou's reaction. He knew it was silly, but opening his wings inside the demon's building felt… wrong. It almost felt like he'd be disobeying Kanou's most important rule: Ayase was never to even think about leaving the penthouse without permission. Kanou was overly paranoid that the angel would leave him, and had gone to great lengths just to drive the seriousness of his rule home; enforcing the windows so they couldn't fully open, monitoring the elevator outside the penthouse front door. It was all a bit excessive. However, four months had come and gone, and not once had Ayase tried to escape. He knew he would never make it very far if he tried to run out the front door, and he couldn't fly so the window had never been an option. Even now, when his wings were nearly back to normal, he had no intention to attempt an escape. He had somehow forged a bond with the demon, as crazy as the idea sounded.

But, oh; how he longed to join those free birds in the sky! For as long as he could remember he had dreamed of touching the sky; to stretch and soar high above the clouds, feeling the cool air rushing by and knowing he could go anywhere he longed to. In the sky, no one was your master. He might not be able to fly, but he was still able to feel the air beneath his wings, running between his feathers.

His wings fidgeted and Ayase found himself rolling his shoulders absentmindedly. He wanted to open his wings and stretch. For four months he had been patient and played by the rules: now he wanted to be given some room to breathe. An urge to run around the room flapping his wings had slowly been overpowering him for the past week- longer even. Kanou was a demon who didn't have any wings, but surely he would understand that- now that the angel's wings had healed- they needed to be exercised in order to keep functioning properly. Maybe, maybe giving them a few stretches wouldn't hurt anything.

A memory of the ropes that had held his wings closed during his captivity suddenly flashed through his mind- the true reason he was hesitant to allow his wings to spread out. In the aftermath of the demons attack, worse than the beating and torture had been the sheer helplessness of being tied up. Not only had it been utterly demeaning, but it had left him feeling completely exposed and vulnerable, at the mercy of his tormentors. Even though he knew he couldn't fly if he'd wanted to, being tied and his wings restricted had made the situation even more real and frightening. And never again did he want to be tied down.

Wincing, he reached behind with one hand to massage the top ridge of his left wing. He could still feel those phantom ropes holding him down. He was an angel, and an angel was never meant to be grounded, to have his wings constrained. His wings were a gift from God, a pure part of himself that was special, separating him apart from the humans and their sinful natures.

Even if he couldn't fly, Ayase took great pride in his wings. Each day, often multiple times, he took time to care for each feather. Unlike birds, angels didn't molt: their feathers were different from their avian look-alikes, formed individually by God's hand and infused with His love and power, making them incredibly strong. Though lightweight, the feathers were as tough as steel, ensuring they couldn't be pulled out and allowing the wings to often be used defensively in combat. They are the embodiment of an angel's individual love, courage and passion for truth.

Ayase blinked, blushing as he realized he'd been standing at the window and smiling to himself for the last few minutes. He couldn't help it though: he was overly fond of his wings. More importantly, Kanou knew how special the wings were to the angel. Without letting himself think, he very slowly rolled his shoulders down and allowed his wings to begin to unfurl. A soft rustling filled the kitchen as the joints in his wings pushed the feathers out to display. His heart was beating faster now. There wasn't room by the window to completely open his wings, but a giggle escaped him anyways as the feathers pushed against the counter in their eagerness to extend fully.

Breathing deeply in happiness, the little angel stepped away from the glass and threw his head back as his wings straightened out as much as they could, rustling gently. It felt too good. The urge to force the window open and feel the cool morning breeze blowing through his feathers was too strong, so Ayase stepped back, tucking his wings back against his body as he left the kitchen. Out in the large living area, he set his cup down and spread his arms wide, not hesitating now to open his wings to their full spread. The feeling was glorious.

Experimentally he gave a few large flaps. A magazine on the low table flipped a few pages over as the resultant breeze ran against the closed pages. The curtains at the far end swayed. The ache in his wings bristled to a sleepy awareness as he used the muscles for the first time in months. Almost giddy with the feeling of delight running through him, Ayase didn't let the ache stop him. He felt empowered again, rebellious, alive as he hadn't felt since coming to live with the over demanding demon. Though he knew his dream to fly wouldn't come true even if he spent the rest of his life attempting to rehabilitate himself, simply knowing that his wings were nearly functional again made him incredibly happy.

A sudden spasm ran through his right wing and Ayase let out a yelp. Reaching over his shoulder, he found the quivering muscle and attempted to soothe it. He'd gotten overexcited. His wings had only recently finished healing from the abuse- they weren't ready to push through the air so forcefully. Flapping like a drunken maniac probably hadn't been the best idea, but Ayase couldn't help but smile. His wings were healing, and that was good enough for him. Soon enough, he knew they'd be stronger than ever before.

()

Humming softly to himself, Ayase mindlessly made his way around the living area with a duster in his hand. Kanou was at work, and already he had finished cleaning the kitchen spotless, leaving it to dry from a thorough mopping, with the chairs and trashcan stacked on top of the table. Even though he had just dusted last week, the angel had decided to move on to the living room. He was bored; stuck at home every day, what else was there for him to do but clean?

It had been a month now since he removed the bandages from his wings. Every day while Kanou was at work, Ayase did simple exercises to strengthen his wings and regain control over them. He was still sloppy, and oftentimes they fidgeted or flapped without his control, but the day he had managed to open them without feeling any pain had left him ecstatic. He had shown Kanou, expecting a pat on the head instead of a narrowing of dark eyes and gruff, "stop messing around with your wings, Ayase." The lack of encouragement from the man had been disappointing, but Ayase hadn't let it stop him from feeling immensely proud in the fact that his wings had made a complete recovery. They still folded awkwardly behind him and were no stronger than they had been before the attack, but the pain was gone- and in its place a feeling of rightness had settled over him.

For the first time, he felt like himself again.

Absentmindedly, he ran the cloth over each surface, wiping away what little grime had accumulated. He swayed slightly as he worked, as though dancing, just so he could feel his wings bob behind him in tune to his movements. The table he was dusting was absurdly filthy, considering he had just cleaned a week ago. His nose crinkled as tiny flecks of dust puffed into the air, no doubt drifting away to lay upon the carpet- he'd have to vacuum next.

Moving to the large bookcase set against the wall of the hall's entrance that led to the front door, Ayase began his assault on the lower shelves. With the kitchen floor still shining with moisture from his thorough scrubbing, he would have to wait to retrieve a chair in order to reach the upper shelves. It could take an hour for the floor to dry, though. Lower shelves cleansed of dust, Ayase set back on his haunches and looked up at the higher shelves. The bottom shelves really hadn't been too dirty- maybe the top ones would be fine to leave for a while?

Standing, even on tip toes, Ayase couldn't see the tops of the three highest shelves. Stepping back, he jumped, wings rustling as he craned his neck. Ah, he could see the third shelf. Not too bad looking, but surely the top shelf would be filthy. It was impossible for him to leave a job midway if he knew it was nowhere near complete, but if the top shelf wasn't too bad then he wouldn't mind waiting to retrieve a chair. However, there was always the possibility that it was covered in a layer of dust- like the coffee table- and that would be impossible for the boy to ignore, even for an hour.

He jumped again, but still the top two shelves evaded his efforts to examine them. Huffing in annoyance, Ayase stepped back, spread his wings, and jumped again; as he lifted, he flapped once, knowing he wouldn't be able to stay airborne but simply hoping that the updraft would push him higher, even momentarily.

He dropped like a stone and immediately leaped again, flapping his wings, which struggled to obey his wishes. Alas, they were no help to his desire and only succeeded in knocking over the pictures on the lower shelves with the gusts of air. Attempting to lift his body higher into the air on healed, yet deformed, wings had been an absurd idea. This was the first time he'd actively tried to use his wings since coming to live with the demon, and it felt mildly disappointing to be reminded of his handicap. With a cry of exasperation, Ayase fell back to the earth, wings fluttering ungainly behind him as he fought to regain his balance.

Sudden movement from the hall drew his attention.

Ayase turned, a smile lighting his face as he recognized the intruder.

"Kanou! You're home early-" His smile died. The demon looked positively livid. The door to the penthouse was still open behind him, his briefcase discarded midway down the hall.

"Kanou? What-"

He didn't have time to finish. Kanou had grabbed the boy's arm, eyes blazing.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Kanou? Ow!"

Ayase cried out, eyebrows furrowing in pain as Kanou shook his arm hard, wrenching at the socket.

"Did you really think I wouldn't catch you? How long has this been going on, _pet_?"

"What? Kanou, what did I do?"

Slitted eyes flashed and before Ayase could think to move Kanou had released his arm and slapped hard across the boy's pale face. Ayase staggered, letting out a shocked yelp. Kanou- Kanou had struck him!

Before he could collect himself, he was being dragged down the hall. Ayase's eyes were full of tears. What had he done?

"Kanou- ow! That hurts, Kanou. Let go!"

Down the hall, they turned the corner and entered into the open bedroom they both shared. Ayase's heart plummeted as Kanou turned and flung him onto the huge bed.

Trying to salvage the situation and regain some control, Ayase picked himself up and turned to Kanou on hands and knees, eyes beseeching. Kanou merely stared back, breathing heavily, anger clouding his gaze.

"Kanou, what's wrong? Please, tell me what's wrong. I'm sorry if I've done something to upset you, but-"

"Your clothes." The brusque statement stopped Ayase in his tracks. Slowly, he lifted a hand and fisted his shirt at the chest. Beneath the fabric, he could feel his heart beating erratically.

"Wha-?"

"Take them off." Kanou folded his arms over his chest as a look of horror crossed Ayase's face. "Now."

This wasn't happening. They'd moved past this horrid stage, hadn't they? Ayase couldn't speak, didn't know what he could even say in this situation. Before him, Kanou glared. Those dark, dragon eyes dared him to rebel, to disobey in any way. Those eyes screamed for punishment, for pain. But _why_?

"Kanou, I-"

"You're not undressing, Ayase."

The name was purred, so sickeningly sweet that Ayase knew he was in trouble.

He shook his head, blond tresses swinging into his suddenly blurry vision. "Wait." He couldn't breathe. "Wait a moment, Kanou. Let's talk. I don't understand what's happening."

"Of course you don't. You never do, even when it's obvious what you've done wrong."

Ayase opened his mouth to argue the unfairness of that statement, but immediately shrank back when Kanou growled and began to stalk forward.

"Want to argue, huh?"

Ayase scrambled backwards, wings fluttering anxiously. His hand slipped on the blankets and he went down on his back, and immediately went into panic mode as Kanou strode forward aggressively. Forsaking all rational thought, Ayase grabbed the nearest item- a pillow from the headboard behind him- and flung it at the demon descending upon him. The action only seemed to infuriate Kanou even further and Ayase screamed in terror as the demon lunged across the bed and grabbed hold of him, even as the boy turned to leap from the bed.

"No!" Panic had control of his motions now. He was twisting, screaming furtively; wings flapping and beating the man behind him. Kanou had a firm grip on the boy's ankle and, with one swift tug, he pulled the struggling angel across the covers of the bed. The new angle had the demon's head at the mercy of the rapidly beating wings.

"No, let go!" Ayase reached forward, clawing at the sheets. His wings were still flapping outrageously, striking Kanou in the face with each frantic beat.

"These stupid wings!"

Roaring, Kanou released the boy's ankle and backed away as the bony forearm of one shining wing clipped his cheek. Immediately, Ayase sprung forward, scrambling to his feet and plastering himself to the headboard, clutching at the wood and breathing heavily. Behind him, Kanou jumped onto the bed. As the bed indented, Ayase flung his head around, eyes wide as his lover leveled a look so deadly at him he knew he was in for a world of pain if Kanou got his hands on him again. As the larger demon moved forward, Ayase flung himself to the edge of the bed and jumped, wings unfurling to catch the air. There wasn't enough room to maneuver; he propelled into the wall, wings attempting to pump, small hands scrabbling at the wood in an effort to stay airborne. He latched onto a heavily framed painting- which tilted under his weight and the rush of air being pumped from his aching wings- and immediately began to turn his hanging body in a direction that might lead to escape. From behind, Kanou was roaring, his words indistinguishable in Ayase's pounding ears.

Struggling to keep himself up, Ayase prepared to leap for the wardrobe a few feet from him: his wings had carried him away from the demon on the bed, but they couldn't fly him out of this mess. Where could he even go? He felt frantic, unable to comprehend what was happening or even to think about where he was trying to escape to. Anywhere but here…

His ankle was grabbed, and brute force ripped the boy's body from the air, hurling him onto the bed. Ayase let out a cry as a heavy weight settled over the backs of his legs. He was on his stomach, and his hands reached out in front of him, desperate for escape he knew would never be achieved. Anxiously, his wings still beat the air. He tried to stop them, but terror had him in its claws now. He couldn't think properly, much less find control over the feathery appendages he had been struggling to master.

With a snarl, Kanou grabbed the frantic wings together in one hand and pushed them up near Ayase's head, who screamed at the angle. Viciously, Kanou's other hand began to easily tear Ayase's shirt from his body.

There was no stopping it. Ayase knew this, yet he couldn't help but try to placate the obviously angered demon sitting on his legs.

"Kanou, I'm sorry! I'm sorry, please, stop. I'll take it off myself. Please stop!"

"Too late for that, you treacherous little fiend. You just keep making it worse for yourself. Proving my point…" He fisted the wings tighter and Ayase let out a cry. "If I were you, I'd stop talking. Stop talking, because the more I hear the more I want to make you scream."

The shirt was in tatters by now. Ayase's body trembled as sobs racked up from the depths of his belly, making him feel sick; his wings- ever traitorous to his desires- fluttered vainly in Kanou's grip.

A low growl barely reached Ayase's ears. "Ayase, stop trying to get away."

"I'm not!" The squeaked denial had come automatically, and Ayase's eyes widened fearfully as Kanou struck the bed with enough force to cause the mattress to dip and the springs to creak uneasily.

"Cut the act! You're more devil than I am, _little angel_."

"What are you talking about?"

"Maybe I should just tear your wings off, hmm?"

Ayase's heart stopped. What had Kanou just said? Tear his- His eyes widened, body grew cold at the very idea. He wouldn't.

"You're never leaving here. It's pointless to have wings; you'll never be allowed to fly away."

"Kanou-" Horror such as he had never felt before had frozen Ayase. Words escaped him. "You- you wouldn't-"

"Oh wouldn't I?" Ayase could almost picture the sneer that must certainly cover Kanou's handsome face. One of the large hands shifted to clench his left wing closed, gripping it close to the base where it connected to his back, right by his shoulder blade. Ayase's heart dropped out of his stomach and a cold fear gripped him.

"No, no!" Panic. Pure panic filled him, erasing all reason and logic from his mind. Only the feel of that menacing hand holding his wing, threatening to tear it out of his flesh, remained. His body moved, thrashing wildly as new tears of helplessness stung his eyes.

"I've told you before that I would do anything to keep you chained to my side, Ayase. Seeing you plotting behind my back, trying to escape- you're never leaving, and if this is what I have to do to keep you here, then this is what I will do!"

"No, Kanou, please! Please don't!" He was dissolving into sobs again.

The demon above snarled. "Shut up! You are such a fool, Ayase. You keep forgetting who holds the power here. It was never you, angel. You belong to me. The little freedom I've given you has gone to your head. Well you need to get _this_ into your head, sweets: _you are never leaving me_!"

"I never tried to-"

"Enough!" Kanou's grip tightened enough that it felt like he was pulling the wing from Ayase's back, and the angel panicked anew. His legs tried to kick, body thrashed, fingers scrabbled uselessly at the thrown sheets.

"Kanou, don't- it hurts. It hurts! Please! Let go!"

His cries only seemed to make the large hand tighten further on his wing**. **Responding to the tug, Ayase's torso lifted from the mattress, arching back even as he twisted fitfully. In his thrashing, his right wing had knocked Kanou's other hand away, freeing it to beat frantically at his side, but almost immediately Kanou's empty hand slapped down on the free wing, pinning it to Ayase's back and forcing the boy's upper body back into the mattress. The blankets almost smothered the scream that had torn from the boy's throat as the wing bent to his body unnaturally.

"Kanou, please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" His hands reached behind himself, clinging desperately to the large hand that cruelly still gripped his left wing. He couldn't see through the tears. Pain spiked through his shoulders.

The bed dipped further as Kanou shifted, putting more weight on the hand that pressed the boy's right wing to his back and earning a fresh cry of pain from Ayase. His other hand pulled slightly, grip tightening on the crumpled left wing.

"You've really pissed me off, Ayase, so I suggest you shut up and start pleading for mercy. I'm not kidding you when I say I'll pull these wings from your body. It'd be like pulling a stupid weed from that Okama's pathetic flower garden."

Ayase's heart was going a hundred miles an hour. He couldn't breathe, couldn't think. This man, this demon, was not the Kanou he knew. His Kanou would not cruelly hurt him like this, in a display of blatant degradation and domination. He hadn't even done anything, and yet Kanou had reacted so violently. And still, still he had not let him go. Why? What had he done?

"Kanou, please, I've said that I'm sorry-"

"You don't even know why you're apologizing, you little schemer."

_What_?

"I don't know why I didn't just tear your wings off the first day I brought you here. It would have saved us so much trouble, so much hassle. Then you never would have gotten these funny thoughts in your pretty little head." The grip tightened and Ayase winced, struggling not to make a noise. "I could just do it now."

A gasp escaped from Ayase before he could hold it in. Who was this man?

"Kanou. I'm scared, please, let go of me." God above, he was trembling like a leaf on a tree in winter. The tears wouldn't stop flowing. "_Please_."

From above him, there was no answering sound. Ayase didn't dare move. He focused on breathing, on regaining control over the sobs that had racked him. He hadn't realized how vulnerable he could still be to this man who had claimed him. After all the abuse, the rape and shame, he hadn't realized anything could make him feel so defenseless. But this, half naked and pinned down on the bed he shared with the man he had come to acknowledge as maybe more than a master, with said man's hand clutched violently around his wing, threatening to tear it off- Ayase had never felt more terrified.

Tremors shook his small body. The silence from the man behind him only increased the tension he felt in his bones. What had happened to cause Kanou to explode? The day had been going so well, too. And now… it felt like the trust that had developed between them had shattered so easily. Ayase sobbed into the sheets, his fingers still clutching at the larger ones around his wing. He couldn't tell how long had passed. Still, Kanou said nothing, didn't move. They were at an impasse, a stalemate. If only Ayase knew what Kanou wanted to hear, he would gladly say it, proclaim it to the heavens. But Kanou was giving no direction, perhaps not even breathing. He might not even have been behind him at all, but for the coolness of his hand clutching Ayase's wing and the heat of his weight on Ayase's legs.

Very gently, the hand grasping his left wing slowly released it. It took every ounce of willpower Ayase had not to jolt away. Relief and confusion warred within him as the freed wing slowly dropped, the feathers unruffling: Kanou's other hand remained on top of his right wing. Unwilling to relax his tense body, Ayase breathed deeply. The silence was unnerving, made even more so by the fact that the man had released one wing and not the other. What was Kanou thinking?

A light touch to his freed wing had Ayase nearly jumping out of his skin: Kanou was running his hand over the wing's edge, gripping it slightly to force the wing to extend. Too much adrenaline and fear was pumping through Ayase's body for him to find any pleasure in the touch. Wildly he kept waiting for the moment Kanou would seize his wing again. Instead, the demon seemed interested only in tracing the different layers of feathers. He pulled the wing back to study the underside plumage, where he could more clearly see the separation of feathers. Light touches, almost apologetic, marked his study from wing base where they grew from Ayase's back, to the ends of his primary feathers at the very tip of his wing. During the inspection, Ayase stayed silent, allowing the strange examination. He jolted slightly when Kanou tugged softly on one of the feathers- not in a hurtful manner, more curious.

Then, as if nothing had happened, Kanou leaned back on the bed, removing both hands from the trapped wings. For a moment, Ayase just lay there, breathing, collecting himself. He didn't dare move, not while Kanou kneeled silently behind him, not after what had just happened.

Instinct screamed at him to jump off the bed, find a space under the desk or in the closet, and to cradle his abused wings in his arms, smoothing the feathers and piecing his heart back together. But Kanou's presence behind him was like a force weighing him to the bed. If he dared to move, would Kanou pounce again? Would his threats become reality?

"I'm going out right now."

Ayase flinched at the cold tone of Kanou's voice. A cold chill stole through him, seeming to stop his heart. Kanou seemed angry still. But why? Ayase had to find out, but he couldn't find his voice. It would make Kanou angry again if he spoke now.

"Put a shirt on, Ayase. I'll be back later tonight."

The dismissal stung. When Kanou didn't move, Ayase managed a jerky nod. His wings trembled. The bed shifted and Kanou moved away from him, and soon the front door clicked closed with a soft _snick_.

()

It was over an hour before the little angel was able to move from the bed. He'd kept expecting Kanou to storm back in, and his fear had rooted him to the mattress, body shivering from the stress. They'd had fights before, but Kanou had never treated him so hostile before: rape, repeated sexual abuse, guilt-tripping, flaunting his shame, debasing acts of humiliation, taunts about his angel family and the cousin who had betrayed them- Kanou had done it all in the beginning, but during the last few months there had been a change in his behavior. It wasn't that he didn't still force himself onto the angel or order him around and forbid him from doing things; he'd just become gentler about it. Somewhere along the way, he had started to show affection and maybe even concern for Ayase's well-being; as much as a demon could, anyway. Though he never apologized for his actions, Ayase could tell that the demon felt some remorse for how he had treated the angel their first week together. Almost half a year had gone by already, and in that time Ayase had started to breathe a little lighter in the presence of the one who had claimed him, but tonight- it was as if they had backtracked completely to the beginning of their relationship.

After wrapping himself in a blanket, Ayase moved to peak out into the hall from the bedroom door. The house was silent, the corridor and beyond doused in a blanket of thick shadows. Slowly, he moved forward into the living room. Not even bothering to switch on a light, he surveyed the open area: The front room was empty, as was the kitchen.

For a while, Ayase just stood in the entrance. He considered going to the door and trying to leave, but that would inevitably make things much, much worse. Kanou had been in such a state of rage- it was a moment where he hadn't been able to recognize the man, which was frightening. If he dared to attempt an escape now, when the demon was fresh from such a heated confrontation- Ayase was too scared to even contemplate what the punishment would be. Kanou would probably make good on his threat and tear his wings off before tying him up and chaining him in the closet for the rest of his life. Even if he did leave, where on earth could he go? In a perverse and twisted way, Kanou had managed to become his new family. There was no other place left for him.

Knowing Kanou had left because he was so angry at the angel made the apartment feel cold and foreign. It was unimaginable to think that they could have even gotten into this situation, and over what? Because Ayase hadn't been prepared for Kanou's early arrival and had dinner ready? Had he left his clothes on the floor? No, Kanou was more of a slob than he was. Had it been something he'd said? Or-

He inhaled sharply.

_Maybe I should just tear your wings off._

The demon's voice, full of rage and hate and _fear_, echoed in his mind. It had been his wings. Kanou… he had come home just when Ayase was using his wings to see the top shelf.

Ayase had confessed to the demon once before that he couldn't fly: it had been on one of their better days when the two of them had relaxed peacefully on the couch together after dinner. Ayase had felt so warm and safe after a few drinks of wine that he hadn't bothered to complain when Kanou removed the bandages from his wings and began to touch them, massaging the muscle and smoothing out his feathers. Softly, the demon had asked why they were so small and slightly deformed, and Ayase had simply whispered the truth**.**

Not once had Kanou mentioned Ayase's weakness since that night. Ayase had assumed it meant that the demon understood that he really did have no means to escape; but now that he thought about it, it didn't mean that the demon had actually believed him. The chain on the window had stayed where it was, and the elevator on the penthouse floor constantly monitored. Ever since his wings had healed, Ayase suddenly realized that Kanou had begun acting more distant with him. Today, seeing Ayase actually attempting to use his wings- even in such a benign context- had Kanou felt threatened? Did the very notion that Ayase even dreamed about flying make the demon uneasy, even if those dreams were pure fantasy? Or worse, did he really think that Ayase had lied when he said he couldn't use his wings?

Ayase didn't know whether to laugh or cry at this thought. Here he was, a prisoner fully aware of his position, and the master was the one fretting because he'd decided to stretch his stunted wings. It was so incredibly unfair that Ayase wanted to scream. He'd been the victim, the one to be stepped on and brutalized, and now Kanou wanted to play the victim? After all this time, Ayase had not once stepped out of line or tried to escape. He'd been good, tried his best to please the ever-scowling demon, and this is what his hard work and meekness had achieved? The more he considered the idea the more he got angry, and the more he got angry and thought about what Kanou must have been thinking, the more he began to depress. And then, as though he had never been mad at all, he felt a huge weight of sorrow compress on him, like an iron had attached to his feet and was dragging him to the depths of the ocean.

As if in a trance, his feet began to move towards the chair he had claimed by the window. During the day, this chair was painted in sunshine: now, in the advancing twilight, it sat in shadow, alone and uninviting. Tucking his feet under himself, Ayase curled his body into the chair like he wished it would absorb him into its padding. He felt empty.

Sitting in the dark, Ayase thought about how he had gotten to where he was. Living with Kanou was nowhere near a normal arrangement: as an angel and a banished demon, they should never have crossed paths, let alone be sharing the same household. Had his parents been ordinary angels, Ayase would have grown up in heaven instead of on earth, yet fate seemed to have had other plans. Living with the angels on earth and sheltered because of his weakness, Ayase had been naïve enough to believe that he would always be protected. He had been wrong.

Breathing deeply, Ayase closed his eyes, allowing his misery to carry him back to that fateful moment in time: the day the demons had attacked and his life changed forever. He had run during the assault, but not far enough: A band of misfit demons not associated with the attack had cornered him in a lost section of the city, and Ayase had been powerless to stop them as they took him to their boss- a demon who had come by choice to live on earth in order to run a black market scheme and feed off the evil that festered in those parts of society. It wasn't a time Ayase liked to remember, but now- in this moment when he felt hurt and betrayed- the pictures came to him vividly. He'd been beaten, degraded, his wings nearly broken, and shamelessly taunted. Then, to further humiliate him, he had been drugged, his wings tied closed with ropes, and put on an auction for the demons who gathered in the city. That was where Kanou had saved him- a banished demon that Ayase had known once on the streets, four years before the day he'd been captured.

Kanou had never told the angel how he knew where Ayase was that night, but any joy he'd initially felt at waking up to see a familiar face had been squashed immediately. Their first few nights together had been traumatizing, to say the least; and while Ayase had been injured during his captivity with the demons, Kanou had only worsened his physical and mental condition. The days had dragged on; Ayase's cries to God had felt unheard, and Kanou's very presence had seemed a looming threat. As the months slowly drifted on, though, and Ayase's body began to heal, their interactions began to change.

Slowly, they went from tiptoeing around each other to simply stepping lightly. The demon remained volatile, angry at his lot in life for being banished, but he seemed to grow softer with the angel. The fear Ayase had felt at the beginning of their relationship had slowly taken the back burner position as a new sense of familiarity grew between them. He had learned to read the demon's moods, to do as he was told and do it quietly, and in return the demon had responded by taking the boy outside the apartment to see the humans and get fresh air, and by making an effort to be gentle in bed. A fragile sense of trust had been building between them over the last few months. Like school kid crushes shyly getting to know each other and their respective boundaries, they had been branching out recently, testing the waters of their dependence on one another.

That trust had only grown stronger when Tetsuo, Ayase's older angel cousin, had appeared in Kanou's work one day. The brazen angel had sauntered in, ignoring the humans milling around, and had demanded to see Ayase before realizing that his cousin was already waiting downstairs to meet Kanou. As the older angel had hastened towards him, Ayase had been overcome with shock at his cousin's appearance: Once pure white wings were smudged with black, as though a bucket of paint had been tossed on him, and the radiance which shone from all angels had been so dimmed around the man that Ayase could hardly see the glow. The turning of his wings and loss of angelic light only meant one thing: he had betrayed the angels and God, something Kanou had been insisting was true since the beginning. Before, Ayase had constantly defended his family: To see the proof before his eyes had been horrifying.

Frozen in his tracks, Ayase had simply watched, appalled, as Tetsuo urged him to run away together. Presented with the opportunity to leave with the last of his angel family, Ayase had been torn and confused, yet nothing could shake the truth ringing in his ears: Tetsuo really had betrayed him, the rest of the angels, and their Maker. The color of his wings and aura could not deny that one critical fact, no matter how unfathomable it was to the little angel. When Kanou had arrived downstairs, Ayase had feared that all hell would break loose at his anger.

So, he had done the only thing he could think to do: step back, away from the fallen angel. Tetsuo was beyond his help, no matter how much Ayase wished otherwise. He had done the unthinkable, and would have to make things right on his own. Even as Ayase voiced his thoughts, the older angel had screamed insults at him, blaming him for the fact that he was no longer welcome in heaven, and for the lousy payment the demons had deemed appropriate to repay him with. Once Kanou reached Ayase's side, though, Tetsuo had already turned tail, trailing insults and curses behind him.

Even though Ayase had chosen not to leave with Tetsuo that day, he knew Kanou still had a difficult time keeping faith in Ayase's word that he would not run: the angel was still forbidden to leave without Kanou's knowledge. As much as he detested the idea, Kanou owned him, and since the angels had been removed from the city, Ayase knew that he had nowhere left to return to: He couldn't return to heaven without aid, and it was almost pitiable to believe that Kanou would ever allow him to.

Even so, Ayase dreamed of the day when Kanou would realize that he wasn't a feathered pet. Ayase was an angel, a boy who needed to stretch his wings and not live under the feeling of oppression. More importantly, he just wanted Kanou to hear him, to understand what it was that he wanted, and to believe in him.

Letting out a sigh, Ayase curled up into a tighter ball on the chair.

After tonight, it would seem that he'd been mistaken to believe that Kanou had changed or grown to be more understanding. The trust that had slowly been building between them had been so easily torn down, Ayase couldn't help but wonder if it had really been there at all.

()

"Wake up."

"Mmmm?"

"I said get up; we're going out."

Ayase blinked, immediately becoming aware of a discomfort in his neck and shoulders as he came to full wakefulness. He was still on the living room chair, only now there was soft morning light filtering in from beneath the curtains of the window; more importantly, Kanou was walking down the hall towards their bedroom.

Ayase's heart skipped a beat as he listened to the sounds of Kanou's imposing footsteps. Had he not come home last night? The man sounded like he was in a hurry. Was he angry still? Was he not comfortable being in the same room as Ayase?

After stretching for a moment, Ayase got to his feet and made his way down the hall, leaving his blanket behind on the chair. Kanou was changing by the dresser in their room. Ayase crinkled his nose. There was a smell in the air- what was that? More importantly, there was a clear misunderstanding hanging between them that needed to be set right.

"Kanou- um, you never came home last night. I got worried-"

"Get dressed, Ayase. Don't make me repeat myself again."

A flinch at the sharp tone had the angel hunching his shoulders. A terrible feeling of foreboding was slinking through Ayase's body as though someone had thrown a slushy on him, allowing the freezing cold chunks of flavored ice and syrup to drip down his body. Clearly, Kanou was still angry; and if that was the case then Ayase knew from experience that whatever the demon had planned, the outcome would not be favorable for the angel.

Arguing would only enrage the demon even further, though. So, picking his battles, Ayase moved forward quietly and slipped into a new set of clean clothes. Each time he glanced at the larger demon across the room, Kanou's eyes were purposefully set on the wall, away from the blue eyes seeking his out. It felt like he was being rejected. Kanou had never ignored him before. This situation had just turned into a higher crisis level.

"Kanou-"

"Go ahead and use the bathroom first, Ayase, but make it quick. We're going out today and meeting someone. I don't want to be late."

"Oh, um, right. But we-"

Snarling, the demon finally turned to look at the angel, and Ayase felt his insides coil into a knot at the look of anger on his face. Flashing back to yesterday and the terror he had felt, Ayase bowed his head and scooted towards the bathroom. Inside, he locked the door.

()

The day was as bright and glorious as the one before, but neither demon nor angel took the time to enjoy the fresh air as they marched from the tall financial building and towards the sleek black car that awaited them at the curb. Kanou's large strides easily threatened to leave the young angel behind, leaving the boy no choice but to hurry in order to stay by the silent man's side. No clue had been given as to where they were going to meet this friend; a fact which had Ayase biting his lip in worry. Kanou was prone to drastic displays, and in his current state Ayase had no doubt that whoever was expecting them at their destination would be keyed in to Kanou's strange mood. As Ayase was ushered into the waiting car, his only thought was a frantic wish that the friend they were about to visit wasn't a demon who had come willingly to live among the humans. He knew from his parents that Kanou wasn't the only demon currently residing on earth: though Kanou had been forced from the underworld, there were a few others who had willingly taken up residence in this large city, lured by the attraction of greedy, star struck humans.

Even though Kanou had taken many trips outside the penthouse with the angel, never had they gone to see any friends of Kanou's- another detail that had Ayase feeling worried, confused, and just a bit curious. The only nice one at the office that Ayase had met- aside from the stoic human Kuba twins- was a strange human called Someya, who Ayase had instantly taken a liking to, even though it was hard to tell if the human was male or female. If they were on their way to see Someya, Ayase didn't think the trip would turn out to be so bad- but a horrible feeling in his gut was telling him that they were not on their way to see the friendly transvestite.

Going outside was normally such a joyous occasion for the angel. On such rare trips, he would spend the ride with his nose pressed to the window, admiring the trees and humans and sunshine. This time, with such a tense atmosphere, Ayase merely sat quietly in his seat, hands in his lap and eyes trained on the floor. Since getting in the car, Kanou had still not said a single word to him.

He wanted to speak with the demon, but every time he thought he had gotten up the courage, the words would die in his throat the moment he glanced at his companion. It was as though a wall had been constructed between them; a frigid wall of suppressed anger and regret. Kanou's face was unreadable; his expression one that Ayase had never seen before. It almost looked resolute, as though he was steeling himself to go through with a promise he had made to someone he never wished to see again.

That face made Ayase feel as though he were about to face a guillotine.

At last the car came to a stop in front of a building much like the one that housed Kanou's business and penthouse. Stepping from the car, Ayase could feel the tremors of human suffering leaking from the structure and others around it, and immediately his shivers increased. Trying to contain his fear, Ayase bundled his hands into the front pocket of his sleeveless jacket, resisting the temptation to throw the hood over his head and hide from whatever horror surely awaited within this building. Responding to his growing anxiety, his wings rustled fretfully from within his jacket.

None of his jackets had holes sewn into the back- ensuring that when he was out in public they wouldn't be bumped by a human. Though humans were incapable of seeing angel- or demon- wings, along with the pure radiance that glowed around their body, their blindness didn't extend to the physical sense; meaning any human passing hurriedly by could knock into an extended wing without seeing it, and potentially raise awkward questions. For once, Ayase was grateful for this disability. After last night, he didn't want Kanou's attention to be drawn to the nervous appendages any more than was necessary.

Kanou glanced back as he set off towards the building's entrance, and immediately Ayase hurried to catch up and keep pace with the demon. Still, no words were spoken.

A uniformed human opened the door for them as Kanou approached. Stepping inside after the demon, Ayase felt overwhelmed by the suffering he could sense more clearly now; not only suffering, but intense feelings of debauchery and violence. This building- he wanted out, now.

"Kanou, what are we doing here?"

He whispered the words, feeling himself growing sick as they made their way deeper into the building. Well dressed humans were everywhere, as were demons; mingling and laughing and showing no concern for the depravities that Ayase knew they were aware of. A few demons glanced up as he passed and their eyes narrowed in haughty consideration, no doubt recognizing him as an angel. Some of the less intelligent ones winked at him or suggestively licked their lips.

Disgust mixed with shame as Ayase lowered his head and simply tried to ignore the perverse auras radiating from the demons they passed. Had he not been terrified of angering Kanou even more, he would have grabbed onto the demons arm for support.

"We're meeting someone, Ayase; I've already told you. Stay close."

The words had been low and rough, sharp enough to cause the angel to flinch, before the last words finally caught up to him. _Stay close? _Making sure to keep by the demon's side, Ayase peeked up and almost sighed in relief at the sight of his demon growling softly at the demons they passed. Kanou was looking out for him, even though he was angry. Hopes renewed, the angel pressed to Kanou's side as they stopped at an elevator lift. Kanou didn't move away.

As metallic doors opened, Kanou lifted a hand to Ayase's shoulder before steering him inside the box. The touch was comforting, but Ayase couldn't help the feeling of unease that suddenly blossomed in his stomach as the doors slid shut and they began to ascend to a floor near the top levels after Kanou punched a code into a small panel. With every floor that passed, Ayase felt a mild panic begin to take hold of him. He wanted to run, to leave this place. He could sense the torment of human souls more clearly now as they ascended, and in his head, the faint sound of human screams had started ringing, as if echoing from a distance. Mixed in with the torment was a sense of perverse pleasure, which seemed to feed off the agony that so clearly enveloped this place.

"Kanou-"

The hand squeezed gently, and Ayase knew that the demon could feel it too- though he was too scared to even contemplate if the demon felt pleasure from the commotion. To the angel, the pressing weight of torment not only terrified him, but it seemed to sap him of his strength. He was a being of light, and the suffering so clearly being inflicted in this place hurt him as deeply as if he were the one being wounded. His parents had fought the demons so that places like this would not exist: Ayase had been too weak and young to fight in those battles, and he was no different now. Tears started to blur his vision as he concentrated on breathing. He wanted to help these people, but he couldn't even help himself. He really was just a useless angel.

At last, the elevator arrived and opened onto an empty floor; and as Kanou pushed forward gently to exit, hand still on the angel's shoulder, Ayase couldn't help but feel that he was a sheep being led to the slaughter. This place- Kanou could have no good intentions about bringing him here.

The hall they stood in was devoid of life- human or otherwise. As the doors to the elevator closed with a small ding, a curtain seemed to be drawn against the oppressive weight of foreign misery; the phantom screams faded into silence.

Not stopping to look around, Kanou steered Ayase forward, ignoring the way the angel glanced around as they moved. Just past the alcove with the elevator was a large room filled with chairs and small tables. Instead of stopping, Kanou continued to push the angel forward into a long hallway. The midnight black carpet seemed to clash with the white walls in a way that had Ayase feeling as though they were sinking into the ground. To keep dizziness at bay, he focused his attention on the large golden frames adorning the walls, and was both stunned and horrified to see that they held paintings of religious themes next to images of graphic violence and murder. The overall impression it gave him was of a depraved soul. His hopes sunk further.

Midway down the hall, Kanou stopped at a closed door and knocked on the wood. From within came a sudden flurry of rustling, and fear spiked along Ayase's spine. He could feel the unknown person's aura reaching through the door, teasing his body playfully as it asserted its authority by letting them taste its power. Without thinking, Ayase jerked back, only to be stayed by Kanou's hand. Common sense had fled him: he did not want to meet the person on the other side of this door.

Ayase felt his breath stop in his throat as the door- against his wishes- swung open. Blond hair set atop a charming face, with a thick body and muscled arms, the demon looking out at them simply seemed to be a handsome businessman on vacation in an orange shirt and shorts. From his back, a pair of veiny, leather wings sprouted: they were huge, the ridges visible over his head even though they were folded tightly closed. He grinned at them, a smile that had his eyes squinting into crescents.

"You're early, Kanou. Should have let me know you were already here; I would have made coffee."

Despite his easy-going appearance, Ayase could see the evil intent that oozed from the demon's pores like oil.

The demon looked down on Ayase's pale face and smiled; a menacing smirk that only increased Ayase's feeling of unease.

"So, this is the angel you spoke of." His voice was seductively pleasing, and it made Ayase's skin crawl. "Seems a little small."

Kanou sighed in irritation as he pushed forward, forcing Ayase into the room and past the other demon, who immediately shut the door.

"Cut the crap, Gion. We're here on business, remember?"

Ayase felt his heart leap at Kanou's words. What business? Kanou never associated with the demons from his old crowd; or at least, he had never mentioned them. A sudden icy thought caught hold of him, a notion which chilled Ayase to the bone. To this demon before them- Kanou wouldn't- he wasn't planning to _sell him,_ was he?

"Kanou?" Ayase's soft query unwillingly came out as a whimper; he couldn't stop the fear making itself known in his voice. He was frightened. He didn't know where he was, and this unknown demon before them was staring at him as though he longed to eat him. Kanou was a force to be reckoned with on his own, but this demon- one clearly in his full power- exuded dangerous capacity; and worse, intentions that screamed to carry out his dominance.

The demon grinned as though he knew the very thoughts that were racing through Ayase's head. Perhaps he did.

"Never met a fully functioning demon before, have you, kid?"

Was he supposed to answer? Kanou always seemed sensitive about the fact that he had been banished and stripped of most of his powers, so Ayase took care to avoid that topic at home. Would Kanou be angry now if he answered and acknowledged this fact? A quick glance up at his owners face did little to assuage Ayase's fears: Kanou was watching the other demon with the same unreadable expression he'd worn in the car, though fury was slowly starting to overpower the mask.

Laughter halted his attempt to interpret the look on Kanou's face. Confused, Ayase looked back to the other demon, who was smiling through his chuckles.

"Boy, Kanou, seems to me that pretty boy is smart enough to look to you for guidance. I don't think you're in need of my services. He seems devoted enough."

"He's looking to me because you insist on intimidating him with your aura and dark insinuations. My mind is made up, Gion; we're doing this."

"Um, Kanou, what exactly are we doing?"

"Be quiet, Ayase."

"Whoa, you haven't even told him, Kanou? And here I thought being banished had made you soft. I'm almost proud."

A sense of dread had steadily been growing from the worry in the pit of Ayase's stomach as the two demons growled at each other. Something horrible was about to happen- some terrible plot concocted by two demons, one of whom Ayase wasn't sure he could say he truly knew anymore. The need to escape was slowly building.

"What haven't you told me, Kanou?"

The demon didn't look down at him, but his hand tightened painfully on Ayase's shoulder.

"Kanou, please! What's going on?" Panic was fluttering through him, urging him to run. "Kanou-"

"He's paying me to surgically remove your wings, sweet pea; that's what's going on."

And suddenly, it was like the earth had dropped out from under Ayase's feet. Kanou's hand on his shoulder was clenching so hard Ayase idly wondered if the bone would snap, but his mind felt too numb by the words uttered by the other demon- those words that had to be a lie.

"What?"

"Yup, you heard correctly. Kanou came over yesterday and we talked it all over."

"Impossible." Ayase's voice felt weak. He was going to be sick, or collapse, or worse- disappear. "You're lying. This can't be true. Kanou would never." Frantically, he turned his gaze back to his demon's face- a face seemingly set in stone. "_You_ would never. Kanou, tell me it isn't true. Please. Tell me this is all a joke, another one of your ruses to show me that you're the boss."

Those golden dragon eyes closed and Ayase felt his world start to crumble.

"This isn't funny, Kanou. I want to go home now!"

When golden dragon eyes opened, they stole Ayase's breath away. Hurt pooled in those merciless eyes, coupled with a rage so deep it cut Ayase to the core.

"We're not going home, Ayase." Kanou's voice, low and rumbling, prickled the goosebumps on Ayase's arms. "You're getting that operation."

"No! No, you can't do this!"

"You don't get a choice in the matter, Ayase. My mind is made up and nothing you say can change it-"

"Kanou!" He felt so lost. The demon looking down at him was unrecognizable. Never had Kanou looked at him with such an expression before. It was all too surreal- a dream. It had to be a dream. He'd wake up at home on the chair and Kanou would come home, maybe still angry from their confrontation, but Ayase would make pancakes and everything would go back to normal.

Normal?

Looking into the demon's eyes now, Ayase had to wonder if anything could ever be normal for them. This new and unknowable demon would do it, and nothing would be the same.

"No." Disbelief pooled within him. "No. No!" He turned from those dark eyes, intending to run from the room, but the demon's hands held him tight.

"You're not going anywhere, so stop struggling, Ayase."

"No!" The little angel swung wildly, punching the larger body with his tiny fists. A deafening roar had started in his ears, filling the room with thunder. His wings rustled uselessly from within the confines of his jacket.

Kanou wasn't budging from the futile attack on his person, so Ayase changed tactics. He slumped suddenly, catching the demon off guard, who instantly released the boy's shoulder in order to catch his sudden fall. Immediately, Ayase sprang forward, darting out of reach of the roaring demon as he sought refuge by a wooden table. Even though he was in a face-off that he knew would have a horrible outcome if he didn't act quickly, Ayase couldn't prevent the hope that sprang in his chest: Kanou had reacted to save him from falling. There was some hope left.

As the demon charged forward, Ayase maneuvered around the table, holding out a hand to keep the demon at bay- though he knew the man could just as easily tear the limb from its socket before proceeding to grab him.

"Kanou, please, think about this!" His heart was hammering, surely hard enough that it would burst from his chest.

"There's nothing _to_ think about. I've made my decision."

"This isn't something you can just do on a whim! Once you do this to me, it can never be undone. Chains come with a key; but Kanou, my wings will never grow back." Hearing the words out loud had panic clawing at his insides again. His lips trembled as he struggled to hold back hysterical screams. "Please, I'll do anything for you Kanou, but not this." Tears started falling- he couldn't help it.

"Not this, Kanou. Name it, anything you want. I won't use my wings in the apartment, I won't even open them. I'll let you do anything you want to me in bed, or in the shower, or wherever. Whatever! I don't care, just please. Please, Kanou." The demon watched him with blank eyes, and Ayase suddenly knew that it was hopeless. The demon's mind had been made up, and nothing Ayase said now could change it. Staring at Kanou across the table, Ayase felt like everything he'd ever known was being torn from him. Kanou looked so angry, so indifferent to the pain he was inflicting. How could he not know what this would do to the angel?

Did he even care?

"Kanou, why- why are you doing this?"

God above, his voice was trembling in sorrow. Kanou's dark eyes narrowed, but he didn't answer. Instead, a snarl spread across his lips and Ayase knew that a storm was brewing behind those dragon eyes.

"Please, Kanou. Please, I'm begging you."

"_Shut up_, Ayase." Kanou may as well have shouted. His low words hit the boy like a slap to the face, and suddenly Ayase knew that things would never be the same. His heart broke as he looked into the furious eyes of the demon he had come to know.

"You won't do it." He was trying to convince himself now. "I know you won't. I trust you-"

"Just shut up!" Ayase flinched as the demon snapped and slammed his fist into the wall, rattling the possessions sitting on the shelves overhead. "I trusted you, too! And look where it got me! You got me to soften up while you bided your time at home alone, waiting until the day your wings healed enough that you could fly away from me."

"What? Kanou, no, that's not-"

"Shut up! Just shut up, you little viper. You thought you could fool me, so you can save your pleas. I've learned my lesson, and I'll make damn sure that you learn yours. You are not leaving me, little angel; get that message through your dense, pretty head. You are _never_ leaving me."

"Kanou." The tears of fear he'd tried so hard to quell spilled harder as a deep sorrow overwhelmed him. Ayase felt like he was being ripped to shreds. "It's not like that, I can't even fly-"

"Like hell you can't! All those wings do is put stupid, useless ideas in your head. I own you, Ayase, and I will never allow you to even come close to flying ever again. I was stupid to have even believed we could live normally while you still carried those things on your back-"

"Well if you dare to take them away from me I can swear to you now that we'll never live normally ever again!"

Kanou froze as the angel's shouted threat seemed to echo against the walls. Though he was trembling and tears still streamed down his face, Ayase straightened, bracing himself against the table he'd sought refuge by. This whole situation was a misunderstanding, and it was up to him to calm the demon down. The price was too high to be passive. Slowly, he took a step around the table, keeping eye contact with the demon who had seemed to shut down after Ayase screamed at him. Those golden eyes watched with a calculated gaze as Ayase moved, the face set in a mask of rage.

"Did you really just dare to shout at me, Ayase? More importantly, did you really just threaten me?"

"I did, Kanou, because you are making a mistake in your anger." The demon eyes narrowed and Ayase could feel him slipping away again. "I never intended to leave you, Kanou, and I don't have any intention now. Please hear me out!"

Kanou had opened his mouth, bristling with the heated words he wanted to say. Ayase reached out a hand, still too far away to touch the demon. "I wasn't lying to you when I told you that I can't fly. I will never be able to, no matter how much I try. And even though I dream of flying, it doesn't mean anything. They're just dreams, fantasies. It doesn't mean I'm going to slip away in the dead of night and try to run from you."

After making sure the demon intended to stay silent and not make any sudden moves, Ayase inched forward a few paces. "I know you, Kanou, and I know that you'd come after me. The angels are gone from this city and I am sure that God would welcome me back to heaven; but Kanou, you have given me a real home. Yes, you scare me sometimes, and you could work on your anger issues, and learning how to understand that 'no' really does mean 'no'; but that doesn't mean I don't want to stay with you. I never tried to run when I first came to live with you, maybe out of fear and the fact that I was hurt; but when I got over that fear and began to heal, I didn't run because I began to trust you. We became a family. Right now, you are the only person on earth that I trust. And right now, even though you're threatening to take away the single most important thing to me just because you're scared that I will fly away, let me ask you one thing: do you trust me?"

Tentatively, his small fingers met the tense arm of the demon.

"Do you trust me, Kanou? Because I've given you my trust and I'm trying to learn how to give you my love, and I'm just asking for you to do the same. I'm sorry I hurt you, Kanou, but this is all just a big misunderstanding. I won't run; I wouldn't fly even if I was able to. So please, please, Kanou; can we just go home?"

The muscles in Kanou's arm tensed. Ayase couldn't breathe, couldn't even think. He didn't feel frightened anymore, just very sad. How had it come to this moment?

Then, Kanou shifted, and he bundled the little angel in his arms. Ayase's heart stuttered before he buried his face in Kanou's side, struggling to breathe as fresh tears burst from him, born from the sudden rush of relief that flooded his entire being. Kanou felt so warm, so protective now; Ayase snuggled in closer, wanting to show the demon how much he really did mean what he had said.

He moved back as Kanou kneeled down, turning the angel to fit more snugly in his arms. This had to be heaven, safe in the arms of this man who finally understood him-

Ayase flinched as something sharp stabbed into his arm. He jerked, but Kanou's arms held him tight. Wildly, Ayase pulled at his arm, only now noticing that the other demon- the one whom he had completely forgotten about during the shouting match with Kanou- was holding his right appendage, along with an empty syringe.

"He'll be out in a few seconds, Kanou. I'll get everything else ready."

"What? No! No, Kanou, please, I already told you I wouldn't fly away. I won't fly away, I won't fly!"

Those strong arms that had felt like heaven were suddenly thick and imposing brambles, a cage that wouldn't release Ayase no matter how hard he struggled. The drug was beginning to work though, and Ayase was slowing in his movements. He tried to speak, but his tongue was getting heavy, his eyes drooping. What kind of drug was this that it could work so quickly on an angel, even one who had grown up polluted by earth?

"Kanou, how could you betray me?" The tears in his eyes blurred his darkening vision. It was unfair. He was growing limp, but he still felt as Kanou planted a kiss on his head and nuzzled in close to his ear. Funny, through the roaring that was growing in his ears, it sounded like Kanou was crying.

"I trusted… you."

His world darkened, and as he slipped away into complete obscurity, he missed the words whispered thickly against his hair.

"I trusted you too."

()

Hurts. It hurts. Who could be pounding so insistently on the door? Stop, too noisy.

A groan rippled up through Ayase's throat. His eyes crinkled open, only to clench shut again at the pressure pounding in his temple. He felt groggy, with a headache threatening to split his skull open. Turning his head, he realized he was lying in bed, snuggled deep under the covers of the bed he shared with Kanou. As he mashed his face into the pillow, struggling to rid himself of the ache that pulsed through his temple, he fought to recall why he would be in bed during the daytime. Though the light in the bedroom had been off, there had been sunlight trickling into the room from between the closed blinds. He didn't feel sick, though the headache was a killer.

"Kanou." The name came out in a hoarse whisper, a desperate plea for comfort and understanding. And immediately, it struck the boy with memory, and a horrible realization. Watery blue eyes shot open.

"Kanou." Frightened, sickened now. Ayase shot up in bed as though he had been poked with a scalding hot branding iron. Soft blankets were tossed hurriedly off the bed and away from him as if they were filthy, but before he had even begun to reach around to his back to confirm his fears, the rustle of soft feathers and the feel of the connection of the appendages in his back had relief flooding through his small body. Trembling, Ayase let out a small breath.

They were still there. His wings- his stunted, radiantly white, gorgeous wings- were still connected to his back.

He'd been silly, right? Kanou would never do something so horrible to him. He might hurt him, refuse him the right to some things, but he wouldn't really have taken his wings. He had known how important they were to Ayase, and even in a moment of rage, he would never have stooped to something so cruel. Ayase almost giggled. He was silly to be feeling so relieved. Sinking down into the mattress, he unfurled his wings and smiled, closing his eyes at the feel of them stretching behind him.

A frown crinkled his nose. Why did his wings feel lighter and… different? Twisting his head around, Ayase reached behind himself and grabbed his left wing. His heart plummeted.

"Wha-"

He was frozen. The sight couldn't even register.

"No. No way. _Kanou_." Ayase's voice broke at the name of the man he had trusted, his only remaining family, the man he had been trying to learn to love.

Small trembling fingers ran down the top of the wing, casing over the small covert feathers near the top. Tentatively, fearfully, Ayase reached with his other hand to touch the primary feathers at the end of his wing- or what was left of them. Neatly cut edges were just visible beneath the covert primary feathers. It looked like he had a hole in his wing, with the secondary feathers reaching long and proud next to a gap where the primary feathers should have extended.

His wings had been clipped.

He jolted when his fingers made contact with the cut ends of his primary feathers. It didn't hurt to touch, but it felt uncomfortable. More than the physical discomfort, Ayase could feel his heart clenching painfully in his chest. It hurt.

It was as though the picture he was seeing couldn't register in his mind. His wings- though small and slightly twisted- had beautiful, long feathers, not a hole on the end with stubs. He took care of his wings, loved them, displayed them as his pride and joy. Kanou hadn't done this. There was no way he would have given permission to have such an atrocity carried out. Not when he knew how much the wings meant to Ayase, when he knew how much the angel dreamed to be a normal one of his kind. He should have known the simple pleasure Ayase felt when the wind ran through his feathers. He should have known that his wings were the one thing that kept Ayase from feeling like everything he had known had been taken away from him.

This, in his hands, was not real. Because Kanou- the man that Ayase had known and shared his life with for the past five months- should have known that after everything the angel had been through, this would be the one act that he could never forgive.

Yet there they were: clipped feathers solid between his fingers, screaming the undeniable truth.

The memory of Kanou's body holding him close, comforting even while the demon betrayed him, flitted through his mind as he stared through the feathers in his hand. Had everything really been a lie?

Slowly, fearfully, Ayase twisted to his other side, dread pooling in his stomach as his fingers sought out the primary feathers of his right wing. His eyes slipped shut. It wasn't possible. It just wasn't possible!

And yet as his fingers closed around the clipped feathers on the end of his wing, something new and mind numbingly horrible seemed to take hold of him: An indisputable realization.

"Kanou!" He screamed the name, agony pouring from him in tears.

And instantly, his world shattered to pieces.

_Why_?

Shaking, Ayase wrapped his violated wings around his body, hands gripping the snipped ends of his feathers as he tucked his head down on his knees. This… this was more than he could handle. He had come to know his place, to understand that he could never leave. He knew Kanou's habits and what he wanted, what he expected; his passion, anger and insecurities. But, he had thought that the man by now would know all this about Ayase as well. Hadn't he told him he would never leave? Given his word?

What had happened to the trust that had built between them? That trust, and maybe even the beginnings of love, had kept Ayase from running- he couldn't fly to begin with, but it would have kept him from flying away as well. Why couldn't Kanou have seen that? Did he really mistrust Ayase so much? Was he nothing more than a pet bird to be kept indoors, never left alone for fear of escape?

He was a thing now, a possession; not an angel, a boy, a sentient being full of feelings and opinions. Kanou had stripped him of his identity in one cruel, possessive act of dominance.

"Kanou." _My heart is breaking_.

Too much. Unlike chains, this type of tethering could not be undone with a key. It could never be fixed.

He was sobbing now, tremors racking his small body, feathers fluttering haphazardly against his skin as he pulled the wings tighter around himself, hiding from the room he had come to grow so fond of. He couldn't do it anymore. This was the last transgression, the final straw. Nothing could ever make up for this error.

His make-believe world had finally fallen apart: It had been foolish to even hope that it could ever keep up its façade. He had thought things could turn out okay, that things could be different with Kanou- but the demon had finally shown his true colors. He had gone too far, and Ayase's heart would never be able to accept what had been done to him. His hands squeezed the edges of his mutilated wings and fresh sobs poured from him.

"Kanou- I hate you."

_End_

**A/N: **Waaah! Angsty! Poor Ayase, I feel kind of mean for writing this. Did any of you think Kanou would really go through with it? I've had this scene in my head for a long time now and finally was able to put it all on paper. I really wanted to focus on Ayase and emphasize how much his wings meant to him, which is why I didn't put any of Kanou's perspective into this fic; however, if you'd like to see this scenario from Kanou's POV, let me know. I have a few scenes sketched out from his POV already, which I think might help to clarify his slightly OOC behavior in this fic. I might post his perspective as another oneshot later, or maybe a second chapter. Depends how far back I want to go in the story- I tend to get really carried away. School has started again so my time is limited, but a comment might help motivate me to spend time on it. Thanks again for reading. Review please and tell me your thoughts :)


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